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It’s in the Blog-O-Sphere Monday April 7, 2008

Posted by gingerbreadman in Rants.
I Gots My Mad On, Y’all.
It may seem strange that my music has gone quiet now that I’m ready to punch holes in walls and fling dishes at people’s heads, but sometimes that’s just how it goes with crazy people.  What can I tell you;  I am who I am.
It’s bad enough having the Luigi Bros. at home whenever they’re not out on a call….and that’s often.  Not that the business isn’t doing well:  one call pays twice as much as Mike made in a day, and he gets at the LEAST one call a day.  The problem IS, a call only lasts a couple hours at most.  THEN the two of them are sitting around in my house with me.
God, nature, who or what ever did not MEAN for man and woman to co-exist in one place at the same time all day and all night together.  This is not going well. 
My 3 middle kids, Emmy, Katie and Libby have the worst excuse for a father that the Devil ever spawned.  All the kids were very lucky when we finally escaped him, Jess and Becca doubly blessed when they turned past 18 and he could never contact them again no matter what…but the middle kids are still vulnerable.  We hadn’t heard from him in over 8 years, and were all happy.  Each of the girls, on their own, in their own time, have told their friends their ‘real’ dad was dead and that Mike is their REAL dad now.   When I made the decision 8 years ago to cut off all contact with him AND drop any issues with child support *like I was getting any* his parents begged me to still let them visit them.  I reluctantly agreed with the caveat that under no circumstances were they ever to let him be there at the time, to contact them, to have anything to do with that man at all.  He was an abuser, he used meth and crack and alcohol while he was supposed to be taking care of the kids, he even locked them out of the house once in the winter because his girlfriend wanted sex at the time during a visitation.
Any questions why I stopped visitation?
Anyway, the girls went to visit G’pa and Granny for the weekend.  Came home with their usual bags of guilt clothing,  Emmy:  "Do they really think they can buy us for how they ignore us for months at a time?" And I find out that Daddy Dearest has been calling G’pa every week.  And "He’s CLEAN and Sober!!!!"  Going to church 3 times a week!   Asks about the girls all the time!  Maybe soon he’ll be mature enough to even contact them….won’t that be GREAT, girls????
Talkin’ about losin’ your everlovin’ damn mind.  I’m still seeing rockets, pinwheels and sparklers, not to mention body parts flyin around all red and gorey.  I am mad, and I did not need to get mad while beginning to PMS, in the middle of adjusting to a new medication, dealing with some heavy issues in therapy and the new theory Mike has about our business calls.
He thinks sex brings on business.  He’s even tracked it.  Dear God.  Please help me. 
It’s not like I don’t like sex.  Or sex with him.  But ummm….does that sound right to you?
Or maybe it’s just my wanna kill something soon mood.
At least I’m not alone.  I’ve walked around Spaces.  There are a lot of us not feeling so great lately.
I’m going to go do something destructive.  Y’all have a great day!

Ranting fit coming Wednesday May 23, 2007

Posted by gingerbreadman in Rants.
Music for today is just a batch of random songs that either the lyrics or the beat make me feel bouncier.  I need bounce, dangitall.
I am in a bad, mad, sad mood.  I have a migraine, the same one I’ve had since Emily and Kate got home Monday evening (co-ink-i-dink?, I think not!) and thankfully have an appointment tonight at 6 pm to get a shot finally for some relief.  I’ll get doped to the gills, wave sleepily to the kids and try to remember not to flip Mike off and head to bed.  About dadgum time too.
Oh, Jess says to tell you I truly do say things aloud like "dadgumit" and "Oh my stars and garters!".  So there, I’ve obeyed my child.  Why you need to know, or she thinks you’d want to, or would doubt it, I can only guess.  I also say "Lord love a duck", "F%ck me Freddy!" (from a Stephen King novel) and "Well blow me down!".  Vallerie, I am trying to cut back on the Freddy thing.  And I don’t know any Freddy’s….so I’m not inviting adulterous relationships. I just pick up stray things I read.
I am bummed after reading what all the happily, satisfied long-married couples have written about their relationships…not for them for course!  I’m thrilled for them, and grinning in a warped way for my parent’s 40 year marital bliss now too…not that I will dwell on that.  But I’m a little irritated that we’re still stuck in the 5 year relationship of quantity over quality to the point that I was woken up two nights ago at 1 am after he got back from a service call…THEN Laura got me up at 3:42 after a nightmare…and then I was hungry…and then I was simply *awake*.  There are no opportunities for naps during the day anymore, so gosh, I guess since I went to bed around 11:30 pm, I managed a whopping 3 hours or so of sleep and then had to deal with Lala and Emmy both being sick…La’s got double ear infections again, Em came back from the trip with strep throat, poor kid.
So I spent my day of sleep deprivation with a migraine, took La to the doctor and held her down and listened to her scream over the finger prick, over her shot…the screaming because she’s mortally afraid of bandages, not needles.  The sight of them sends her over the edge now, since my mole removal….I guess she thinks she’ll end up with her little body looking like my arm did?  Emmy felt like doggy-doodle and sprawled all over me.  I wanted to run away from home. 
Ever have those days?  Just walk out the door, walk to the bus stop, train station, airport…step on some mode of trainsportation and go far, far, far away and not even look back in your daydreams?
The new meds the doctor gave me at the beginning of the month for the seizures have caused swelling and weight gain…15 lbs.  I told him I wanted to cut him.  He told me to give it the month and if it didn’t level off he’d switch me to something else.  I quit soda…and boy does that bite and I’ve lost two lbs.  I’ve got an exercise machine and that hurts, but it feels good…when La isn’t interrupting my workout.  But I feel huge and yucky and now it’s swimsuit season and I’m eating less, gave up my sodas, the meds give me cottonmouth and I hate just plain old water, I really do, always have.  I feel really uncomfortable in and with my body.  I’d be cool with going up so much in weight if I’d been eating ice cream every night and making a big ol’ country breakfast every morning, dangit…but I didn’t do anything to deserve this pain  Went up a cup size and I was a D to begin with.  That’s just not cool.
If the doctor switches my meds, it’ll just be new side effects to deal with, a new month to find out what the interactions are going to be with the stuff I’m already taking.  I’m still stuck with dropping this 15 lbs–no, 13 lbs now.  Ah well.  Time to try count some blessings.  Thank you Marc, for always reminding me to do that.
Emmy is driving me nuts right now.  Every little thing is a major life crisis with her since we made the agreement that when she had a problem she’d come and talk to us about it rather than keep it to herself or go to her friends with it after the cutting episodes.  Well, she worries over everydangthing in the world.  I wonder if she’s really this stressed out or if she’s just revelling in the extra attention.  She said yesterday she has lots more problems than the other kids in the house.  WHAT????  So we’re dealing with the trauma/drama/trials/tribulations of my 13 year old drama queen right now.  BUT….I’m thankful I have her in my life.  She’s funny, sweet, interesting, lively, always up for a game of whatever and loving as anyone could want. 
Now my font color is wonky.  I can’t deal anymore.  I can’t think of any blessings except my kids, my health and my wonderful friends here.  My family.  Those are plenty, aren’t they?  So many don’t have that.  I’m blessed.
Time to go hold down La and reassure her there’s no band-aids while she gets another shot in the tushy.

HPV, controversy and boys Tuesday February 27, 2007

Posted by gingerbreadman in Rants.
For those living in a cave or without a television, newspaper service or who never read the news stories on all the internet sites, HPV is the sexually transmitted disease that causes many types of cervical cancer and genital warts.  Yes, genital warts too…fact #1 that isn’t often discussed while the controversy rages over whether to require the vaccination of the drug Gardasil for girls entering into public school in grade 6.  HPV is carried by both males and females and affects both males and females-cervical cancer in girls and anal and penile cancer in males.  Why aren’t more parents being encouraged or perhaps pressured, as some think a pseudo-required vaccination does, to innoculate boys and girls before they enter 6th grade?  There hasn’t been enough research done yet to determine if Gardasil will work for boys.  I wonder why not?
Rant #1
Why would a virus spread by males as well as females not be researched in conjunction with the work done for females?  Yes, the HPV virus does cause some types of cervical cancer, definitely a reason for urgency to develop the vaccine for girls, but still, that virus doesn’t just spring up on it’s own on these girls.  It’s given to them…gay relationships aside…by boys.  So why, when the HPV virus has also been linked to penile and anal cancer and genital warts, were only females researched?  While I am beyond grateful as the mother of six daughters to know there is a preventative measure for one type of cancer out there now, I am also scratching my head in wonder at why the same protection is not being given to my nephews, to my friend’s sons, and most certainly to the boys my daughters are dating and will in the future. 
Rant #2
What’s the furor over?!  Legislature has been enacted in some states, mine included, that would make the vaccination a requirement for all girls entering into the 6th grade along with the shots already demanded.  In none of the states trying to adopt this legislation, does one not have a "No Thanks!" clause along with it so that parents who do not wish their daughters to have this innoculation can opt out.  And yet parents, pundits, reporters and preachers galore are having 16 kinds of cow-fits to get rid of these measures that could help *eradicate cervical cancer*.  All because the idea of a vaccine against a sexually transmitted disease, in some minds (small, in my opinion) encourages promiscuity.  WHAT?  As I read in an article today, does a tetanus shot make kids run out and wildly step on rusty nails and slam themselves into barbed wire?  Do we go out and get the flu shot and then rub ourselves against every person infected with it we can find?  Those are rhetorical questions, people, or should be.
Do I think my kids will go out and start throwing their self-respect and virtue to the wind because they’ve been innoculated against a disease that is only transmitted through genital contact?  Pfftt, no, and anyone who is concerned about that has a lot more than a virus to worry about with their kids.  People are going to be promiscuous or not based on who they are inside, let’s be real.  It isn’t as if this series of shots protects girls from all STDs, or pregnancy.  There are still lots of valid health reasons not to be throwing it around, not to mention all the moral and emotional ones.  A girl is going to do with her body what she is led to do by her upbringing, her level of self-respect, her understanding of the dangers and benefits of sexual behavior and plain ole common sense.  Anyone afraid their daughter will become a ho-dee-ho because they got a shot at 11 years of age maybe ought to look at how they’re raising their children, not at the legislature that is trying to help save the kid’s life one day.
Rant #3
If you don’t want your kid to get the shots…don’t sign the papers.  How hard is that to figure out?  The entire point of states trying to get these bills passed through is to eradicate cervical cancer.  The fact that it protects against genital warts is a bonus.  HPV virus is passed from mother to child through the birth canal too…another Fact not many are talking about…that poor kid is doomed from the get-go if Mommy had the virus when it was born.  There is no CURE for HPV, dangit.  There is only this new prevention. 
Here are a few more facts about HPV:

HPV is the most common sexually transmitted infection in the United States. At least 50 percent of sexually active people will get HPV at some time in their lives. Every year in the U.S., about 6.2 million people get HPV. HPV is most common in young women and men who are in their late teens and early 20s. 

There is no treatment for HPV. But there are treatments for the health problems that HPV can cause, such as genital warts, cervical cell changes, and cancers caused by HPV.

It is important for girls to get HPV vaccine before they become sexually active. The vaccine is most effective for girls/women who get vaccinated before their first sexual contact. It does not work as well for those who were exposed to the virus before getting the vaccine. However, most women will still benefit from getting the vaccine because they will be protected against other virus types contained in the vaccine.

The vaccine has been extensively tested in 9-26 year-old females so information is only available about vaccine safety and protection for girls/women of this age group. However, studies on the vaccine are now being done in boys/men, as well as in women older than 26 years of age. The FDA will consider licensing the vaccine for these other groups when there is research to show that it is safe and effective in these groups.

Anal and cervical cancers are believed to be caused by the human papilloma virus — the same virus that results in genital warts. Almost all people are infected by the virus through sexual contact, but their immune systems eliminate the virus before any damage is done. However, some strains of the virus are more tenacious than others, and immune-suppressed individuals have a harder time eliminating HPV from their systems. In these people, the virus can cause dysplasia (or abnormal development), which, if not treated, may go on to become cancerous.

Maybe it’s just me…perhaps I’m blessed with being able to trust my daughter’s judgement and raising and not think that just because they’ve been protected from a STD that is widespread and causes cancer of the cervix they won’t go out and ‘share the love’ indiscriminately.  Let’s face it, until the study came out, who knew that HPV caused certain types of cervical cancer?  Were people being more careful with what they did with their bodies because they were afraid they’d someday end up with cancer?  No?  Then why think they’d act more recklessly because they are now protected? 

Maybe it’s just me…I want research done for the males in our world so that they can also be protected against this virus.  So they don’t contract it, so they don’t spread it, so they don’t get cancers, so their immune systems aren’t further debilitated if there are problems already. 

Maybe it’s just me…but I think it’s time for the self-righteous in the world to stop waving around the "Oh NO…we can’t give teenagers protection because they might do something stupid with it…like USE it!" placard and consider the idea that if true, that’d be the best thing in the world.  How little faith these people have in Good Boys and Girls.  How very sad.

Or maybe, because I  have six daughters and a cervix of mine own….it’s just me.

Always Proud to be an American Wednesday November 8, 2006

Posted by gingerbreadman in Rants.
Sometimes it seems hard to look at the news, read a paper, listen to NPR and not get down, isn’t it?
Murders, rapes, crimes against children.  Iraq and the soldier death toll.  The civilian death toll.  The billions and billions of dollars American taxes are being spent to fund this war and then the rebuilding of this country if/when the war is ever over.  All the corruption going on.  The politicians, oy! the politicians. 
Our children are running rampant in the streets, committing crimes at an earlier age every year.  shooting up schools, committing mayhem against their classmates, their parents.  Using drugs, drinking, having babies.
Nothing but bad news every where you turn in America, if you listen to the news.
Maybe we should all stop watching the news for just a few weeks and go out the doors into the sunshine, or play hopscotch in the mall.  Step outside, spend more time with our neighbors, with our children, in classrooms.
I love America.  Simply Love the Country and ALL IT STANDS FOR.  Even now, even with the concerns, the losses, the things going on, the problems.  It is an amazing, beautiful, FREE COUNTRY.
We still have more freedoms than any other country in the world, and all you have to do is look around truly to see that.  Look at an OVERALL compilation of the statistics rather than one comparison country to country…America is the country to beat.
THOTMAN, my hero, finally broke out of his mush-fest that I thought would never end, and wrote a Patriotic Rant about America extolling it’s virtues and why he loves it so much.  I’d like to do the same…I doubt we’ll have the same reasons as he and I are radically different on most issues.  You should definitely read his…it’s better, trust me.
I am PROUD to be an American!  I am proud that even when my principal is a big enough moron to bring Gideon give-away people to hand out Bibles to our school, I could confront her without fear of reprisals, and if there are reprisals, I have places higher up I can go without fear of government intervention.  I also have the PRESS on my side if need be.  I have an agency, the ACLU, to protect my daughter’s rights if the principal decides to punish Libs by denying her things because her Momma is a "crazy atheist who hates Bibles"  LOL  In too many other countries Religion is forced on people, period.
I love walking into stores and finding all the different goods, so many kinds and sizes and choices and types.  Viva America!  I love choosing which kind of Millstone coffee I want this week.  I love the freezer section and letting Laura scratch her nails across the frost that forms on the door while I prop it open and try to choose the many kinds of pizza the kids will eat this week…SOO MANY KINDS OF FOOD!!!  Not all countries have this luxury, folks.  An American luxury.
I love the bars.  I don’t go in them, but I remember American bars, especially country bars.  Yee-haw.  I love American country bars.  Some ROCK AND ROLLLLLLL, BAY-BEEEE bars!!!!   Whiskey shots, pretty waitresses, great bands and dancing on a too small floor until 2 in the morning.  American tradition…yeah.
I love driving on the interstates, crossing state line after state line after state line, no checking for papers, no ID’s shown, no customs, no bags checked.  Looking at the beauty and ugly of the States, finding out how many amazing diners there are out here in the world and just how dadburn nice people are when you are pleasant to them, every where, not just the South. 
I love the Checks and Balances concept of the United States Government.  Perfect.  Keep them all straight, make sure no one is screwing it up for the people.  Except sometimes the people screw it up and send all the same group to Washington and then we have a problem.  That’s the people’s problem and fault, and the people start screaming it’s America.  It’s not AMERICA…it’s the people on Capital Hill…it’s the VOTERS who sent them all there, but the concept that set America up?
The bluegrass and the yellow corn, the purple mountains and the blue skies?  From the beginnings of this nation, there has been a struggle for right, an independence…and it still goes on today.  That…is America to me.  It is a fight for FREEDOM.  Sometimes it is a bitter fight and sometimes it is peaceful, but it is always AMERICANS striving for freedom, looking forward…
I love the Freedom I feel to love to express myself, regardless of what people around me think (or the expression on their face is at the time!)
I love the Freedom I feel to explore my religion…to have been a Catholic, an Old-Fashioned Missionary Baptist, to practice Wiccan, to study Zen, Buddhism, to delve into Juddaism and other religions as I have and continue to learn as much as possible while holding onto my rank as a "Secular Humanist".  I’d be stoned in many other cultures and countries, wouldn’t I?
I love listening to NPR, to watching MSNBC, to skipping past Greta Van Sustern with my middle finger in the air (since she did an interview with John Mark Karr *also within HER American right)on FoxNews to watch CNN until Larry King comes on (don’t watch him either, he did the Karr interview too).  I can watch news all I want, listen to news in America.  I LOVE IT.  I can read all the news I want online.  I get lots of news from Cheryl’s space, she has some great links.  I celebrate my Freedom of the Press, America’s Gift to Me.
On a personal note…I love America’s school system.  I love the school pageants, I love the churches all over the place, even if I don’t go to any of them and it is a holdover from my childhood…it’s so dang AMERICA, isn’t it?  I love that directly across the street from a BIG Baptist Church there is a billboard with a VOTE GAY ISSUES AS IF YOUR LIFE DEPENDS ON IT.  YES!  Only in America!  I love that in Nevada prostitution is legal.  I love the way our culture works and the way Americans think.  I love that we’re so darn funny and snarky and sure of ourselves.  We should be, darnitall.
I’m proud to be an American.  I HATE HATE HATE when I see "I’m ashamed to be an American…I’m not proud to be American anymore."  Booooo!  Boooo!!!
I’m sick of what has happened in Washington OFTEN.  I’m horrified by much that has gone on and no doubt WILL be.  I HATE George W Bush…but he is not America.  He is the President…the Holder of the Place.
I love ice cream trucks.  I love those Area Safe Space stickers on doors of businesses.  I love reading blogs of Gay groups online now…did we have those 3 years ago? 
Do I love that now people are feeling freer to state they are gay and lesbian in America, even with the Religious Right still shutting down the right to have a civil union legalized?  Of course I love reading my friends!!!  I HATE that the Religious Right is not being open and loving and accepting.  I HATE that my friends cannot get a civil union, or the same rights a man and a woman can.  BUT, that is the AMERICAN way, and I love that we are following that, doing it State by State…there is hope that one day things will change.
I love my kids and all their teenage and pre-teen and toddler American-ized behaviors.  I love NFL Football.  I love that song "God Bless the USA", even all these years after it first came out, and I still cry when I hear it.  Dang Lee Greenwood. 
I loved American College…where I had the choice to go to class or not.  Of course I went, but I went as an adult amidst a bunch of 18-22 yo’s and wasn’t that a hoot?  I learned a lot about what people of that age group thought of America and I was stunned.  Rather, I learned how little they knew about America.  I love the work ethic I have as an American, whether everyone has it or not…because there seems to be a job or career or program for everyone.  I love the classes offered at colleges, the professors at Universities, the texts and the level of intellect necessary to read and grasp the material…College was fun.  American college was fun.  Hard, worthwhile, but fun.
I love America for my ability to blog.  I don’t know how many other countries give their citizens the capability to do this.  I know many don’t, because there are no communications, the poverty level is too low, the women aren’t allowed to communicate, the technology isn’t advanced enough everywhere, etc ad. nauseum.  What I do know is that blogging took me from being a zombie back to the talking too much about too many personal things gal I am again.  I love reading about Thotful guys in Utah, a Casanova in New York, Queen of the Chocolate Hive, Stay at Home Bloggers in Oregon, a Sassy-Sweety in the South, Retired CEO’s and photographic geniuses who work more than a shift of factory workers in Texas, Quarks and Topamax Twins in New Mexico, crazy gardening picture taking truck drivers, Biker Chicks in Maine, Roses by the Stream, Canadian Ladies, Tennessee Gals, Photographers all over, the GayMenWhoRule…
I’m connected to the States, outside the States…by my Freedoms given to me by America.  Thank you, Forefathers.  Thank you, all who have fought for, and died for these rights.  While Veteran’s Day isn’t until Saturday, and Election Day was yesterday, this is a mid-week blog celebrating AMERICA DAY.  The day I’m just…
"Proud to be an American, where at least I know I’m free
And I won’t forget the men who died to give that right to me.
And I proudly stand up next to you to defend her still today
Cause there ain’t no doubt I love this land…
God Bless the USA"

Officer Died, Illegal Involved Friday November 3, 2006

Posted by gingerbreadman in Rants.
I try to avoid, believe it or not, topics that are deeply personal and make me hoppin’ mad, but the local news has so incensed me I just can’t keep my fingers quiet anymore. 
On October 31, 2006 in Bowling Green, KY, a call went out to City Officers "Man with Knives outside".  Four officers responded and during the confrontation, the suspect, Rojelio Gonzalez Pacheco came after Officer David Whitson with two knives.  Both Pacheco and Whitson were shot and killed during the Vine Street incident.
As the Newschannel 5 website reports it: 

"During the call, an altercation ensued and Officer David Whitson and Rojelio Gonzalez Pacheco, 26, were injured on the scene. 

The suspect had two knives in his possession, but no guns. The officer may have been shot by his fellow officers during the altercation."

It’s come out since then that Pacheco was tased first and it "didn’t take", that he was impossible to talk down, and that he came at Officer Whitson with the knives.  There were four shots fired at least, but as yet the official autopsy results of neither of the men have been released. 

Horrible enough.  A good Officer is gunned down by his fellow Officers trying to protect him.  A wife and children are left to mourn.  Two officers of the three others there fired their guns and ballistics are now being tested to find out who fired the fatal shot, although it is obvious that both surviving Officers will need counselling through this.

Is that enough for this city to mourn?  Oh hell no.  This is Kentucky after all….A week before an election.

Turns out Gonzalez-Pacheco was here Illegally. Let me tell you, the newscasters here couldn’t ‘report’ that breathlessly, or emphatically enough when it came out November 1st.  Suddenly it wasn’t a story of a man with knives gone batty and an Officer shooting.  Oh NOOOO.

It was about how if Illegal Immigration were somehow fixed, none of this would have ever happened.  The implications: if only those damn Democrats weren’t all the time screwing up GWB’s working to keep the bad guys out of Good, Sovereign States like Ours, Officer Whitson would be alive and Protecting and Serving today.

The Ron Lewis for Congress ads ran like mad all across the local news channel,  seemingly worse than ever scourging his opponent for being easy on Immigration as well.

But the facts are, although no one seems to want to deal with those in matters as highly charged and emotional as something like this:

Gonzalez-Pacheco was charged in 2003 with DUI, having a fake ID, not having a driver’s license, and not having insurance. He was in illegal alien then, living in Kentucky. 

From the WBKO (local newschannel an Bowling Green, KY) archive on this issue:

"Warren Circuit Court Judge Steve Wilson says being an undocumented worker is not illegal under the state law, because it’s a federal offense.

Judge Wilson says when undocumented workers enter the courtroom, there are two choices, send them to jail for their offense or release them.

"If they’re released, the INS or the federal government would have to at that time pick them up and have deportation. If they do not do that, they would have to be released," said Judge Wilson.

Judge Wilson says when he was the Warren County Commonwealth Attorney, he noticed if the undocumented person committed a felony the federal government would begin the deportation process. He says if it was a minor offense, they usually were not deported."



If my happy ass wandered into a courtroom with a DUI, no insurance, no driver’s license and a fake ID, I’d get jail time.  So this guy goes in with those charges and not "Illegal Immigrant" status…but "Undocumented worker"

Doesn’t that sound nice?  Or nicer, I guess….

And I suppose gets probation and a fine, sent on his merry little way to continue to work and live here illegally.

And really, that’s fine with my liberal little heart.  Do I like the KY State illegal immigrant policies?  No.  But I really hate the REPUBLICAN policies that are continuously being touted. 

What makes me flaming mad is the way Kentuckians are hypocritcal jerk-offs about this.

Rojelio had a job at the time of his death on a dairy farm.  He lived in a little place on the farm and was responsible for getting up in the early AM, rounding up the cows, getting the herd rounded up and in the dairy and hooked up, taking care of business, another words.  Had hours free during the day off and on and then was responsible for evening round with the herd again.  Here in KY with the milking jobs, you live on the farm in a little house on the Dairy Farmers land and get to know the Owner well.  His employer KNEW Rojelio was an "undocumented".  He *should* have checked it and sent the paperwork in to the government like all employers and landlords are required to do.  But that would have screwed up the Dairy Farmer’s cheaper employment, wouldn’t it? 

Master Officer Whitson was buried with honors, as befitting his life and death.  I join our area in mourning the loss of a fine man and an Officer.  I am sick with anger that the other two officers were put into the position of feeling whatever they are going through now because one of their own is dead because of their guns. 

To blame all this on the tragedy that occurred on October 31, 2006 is being a bit generous to Kentucky Commonwealth Laws, and far too lenient on the lawbreakers who enabled Rojelio Gonzalez-Pacheco’s presence in Kentucky.  He has four brothers living at Vine Street.  His girlfriend of eight months is left behind, mourning his death, questioning why this happened, hoping this will not turn into a focus on illegal immigration.

I don’t know if the toxicology report will show why Gonzalez-Pacheco was waving knives around in a yard at 10:13 in the morning on All Hallow’s Eve.  He was worried about his hospitalized mother still in Mexico it is said.  It is also said he worked hard, adored his girlfriend’s small children as if they were his own and wished to marry her someday if he ever attained legal status.  What we do know for flat-out facts are this:

In 2003 if Gonzalez-Pacheco had been picked up by Immigration he wouldn’t have been on Vine Street to get shot, wave knives or have this happen.  Steve Wilson and "KY law" aside bullshit…an illegal immigrant was in court on charges and walked back out the door free.  Now he and an Officer of the Law are dead.  And this is a Republican State.  *sigh, it is to laugh*

If Gonzalez-Pacheco’s employer had asked for his driver’s license, social security card, green card or worker’s permit as required by federal law…not "state law" when he was hired, he wouldn’t have had the Dairy Farm job, or the place to live.  Would that have meant he’d have still been in Bowling Green?  Would the immigrants who are undocumented workers or illegal immigrants or whatever you wish to call them come in droves or stay for years on end if the Employers and Landlords actually enforced the Laws meant to help keep down Illegal Immigration?

Kentucky is a hideously racist state.  I stopped watching local news a long time ago if I could avoid it for the very reason that started this rant. 

 "Gonzalez-Pacheco was a "breathless outraged tone" ILLEGAL IMMIGRANT!"……"John Davis, a black male, was arrested today for failure to pay child support …"…."Rod Jacobs was arrested today on methamphetamine charges and given recognizance bail"

Guess who the caucasian was…yeah, the guy whose race wasn’t mentioned…I don’t know about everywhere else…but here the race is ALWAYS mentioned if the subject is black or hispanic.  That’s what got me into politics so fervently though…I started watching the 24 hour channels.  LOL

Oh, and while I’m on it…just as an aside…the Wall…the President’s brilliant Wall…how much is that going to cost?  And it covers how much of the Border exactly?  Great idea, George, as usual.  Dumbass.

*Blessings, Y’all*



Bible in her bagII Friday October 20, 2006

Posted by gingerbreadman in Rants.
Finally got to talk with Mrs. Reynolds, the school’s principal about the whole Bible in the classroom issue.  She’s been in meetings or just out of her office all the ding-dang week, driving me crazy, but I have diligently worried the life out of her secretary until today *SCORE*!  And oh my, what a talk we had.  Whether it did any good or not, we’ll find out next year…but I have a feeling this is the first time she’s had a parent ever call and smack her for her ‘traditional’ letting in of the Gideons, let alone lecture her about the Constitution, or let her know what a snot-facted bunch of little pseudo-Christians she’s housing every day in her building.
Me: Mrs. Reynolds, I heard you let a group of men into the 5th grade classrooms the other day to hand out Bibles, I was wondering why you did that;  do you not know about the Church and state separation clause in the Constitution?  Why the 5th grade in particular, or did you hand them out to the entire school?
MR: It’s sort of a tradition, it’s something we do every year, we do it with the 5th graders because they are old enough to choose for themselves and they are told they don’t have to take the Bibles, they can not take them, or if they feel others will be mean to them, they can take the Bibles then and slip them to someone else later or take them home and just not use them.
Me:  I see you didn’t address the Separation of Church and State issues at all, Mrs. Reynolds, there are reasons that was put into the Constitution for very valid reasons…I realize there probably aren’t any Buddhits or Jews in our county that you know of, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t there.  I know there are Pagans living here, there are atheists, agnostics, non-church go-ers.  Did it occur to you their parents might not appreciate you trying to indoctrinate their children or were you too busy trying to save their kids souls to worry about that?  It is not the school’s job to teach religion, it is the parents job, and the church those parents choose to send them to to do that.  That is why there is no religious studies class in lower grades, Mrs. Reynolds.  We escaped Europe in part to not be forced to practice a particular form of religion and here you are forcing New Testament Bibles on 5th grade children.
MR:  it wasn’t the school!
Me:  That’s even worse, it was YOUR decision.  I’ve spoken to the Mayor after church about this Wednesday night, his daughter received one of those Bibles, and as God-fearing and Church going a man as he is, he wasn’t pleased with this action either.  He believes, as I do, that a child’s religious teachings belongs completely within a parent’s choice of instructions.
MR: You talked to the Mayor when?
Me:  Do you realize that you’ve opened the door to an ACLU lawsuit with this?  Do you realize that you’ve opened the door to other religious organizations having the right to come into this school and hand out their religious materials as well?  If I’m Jewish is it okay if I go to Temple Saturday and ask my Rabbi for extra religious materials to be distributed here?  Should I invite my Buddhist friends to have prayers and bring prayer rugs for all the children to use down one day so they can participate?  Should I have a Wiccan coven I know of explain a Book of Shadows?  Do you understand, Mrs. Reynolds that you can no longer holler "Freedom of Religion" because of what you’ve down this week?
MR:  No one has ever complained before…
Me: Mrs. Reynolds, it is not your job to decide what religious books are distributed to the children at that school.  It is not your job to give religious educators the right to walk into that schooland hand out Bibles, even if the children are supposedly allowed to not take them.  The children in this school and county feel pressured to declare themselves Christians or be mistreated in classrooms, playground and at lunch.  Do you realize in one of your science classrooms a 5th grader who is supposedly "ready to decided on her own if she’s going to be a Christian" stated to the teacher that ‘No, man is not made of cells, man is made from dirt, and woman is made from man, as the Bible teaches’.
MR:  Where did you hear this?  What student?  What teacher?
Me:  From another student in the class, Mr. Kessler is the teacher. Here is the point:  This school, this county, this district is already fully doctrinated in the Christian point of view.  You don’t need to help it along, unless you are doing so any way to score futher points with the parents who agree with it, Mrs. Reynolds.  You can try to get around the Constitution by having the Gideons come in and let the children take the Bibles offered willingly, but peer pressure by other children in a hyper-Christian atmosphere is not "willingly", really, is it?  You are leaving yourself and your school open to any religious group coming in to likewise distribute their materials since you welcomed in the Gideons.  Futher, and most important, Mrs. Reynolds, and this is what infuriates me:  it is not your job, your business, or your right as an educator, a person, or a mother, to decide who comes in and hands out religious material to my child or anyone else’s.  That is MY right, and no one ele’s.  How dare you?  I decide who and what my daughter worships.  I decide if my daughter believes in Jesus, Mohammed, Diana, Krishna, the Man in the Moon or the Soft Voices inside her Head.  That right never has or will belong to you or anyone in a school building.  I send her to school to learn how to read, write, do math properly and figure out science and social science.  Not religious studies.  The rest of the parents here do the same.  If I wanted her taught religious themes I’d send her to a Christian Academy. You overstepped your bounds. 
Me: Mrs. Reynolds, thank you for listening, please consider all the points I’ve made when next year comes up and the Gideons want to make their traditional visit to the school.  That’s all I have to say right now.
MR:  I certainly will.  Good afternoon.
I still am angry.  I don’t think I got anywhere.  I’ll find out in 10 minutes as I make my way over to the Fall Festival and run into her 3 or 5 or 10 times in the small gym as I wander the area plunking down money and playing games.  Should be fun.
Have a great weekend all!

A Bible in her Bag Wednesday October 18, 2006

Posted by gingerbreadman in Rants.

Libby, my eleven yo daughter skipped off to school yesterday with her backpack full of notebooks, texts, pencils, homework, various girly-girl things, snack and money for a juice drink and her little purse.  She came back home with all of that, sans snack and money, plus one red Gideons New Testament Bible, given to her during Language Arts class by three men in business suits, sanctioned by the principal of the school.

She only mentioned it to me this morning right before she left for another day at her happy little school of learning, eager to bounce off to more learning about reading, writing, ‘rithmetic and the Blessed Savior.  She was puzzled at first why I was upset by her nifty gift during what should have been a simple hour of learning how to write sentences with her spelling words included, which only annoyed me more.  Apparently I have not done my job properly with this child, or she is one who has been assimilated into the hive that is This Town already and we need to move post haste before she turns metallic inside and loses all her internal organs and begins to look like Jerry Fallwell.

We live in a very, very, frighteningly small town in a big, big county.  That may sound strange and impossible unless you live in the South or perhaps the West.  We live almost directly across the street from the school, I can walk to the doctors office, the pharmacy, the town square, get to the grocery in 4 minutes in the car.  Everyone knows everyone’s business in this little place.  There are 17 churches, almost all of them Baptist of one form or another.  One Catholic, three Methodist, one presbyterian.  No Temples, no mosques.  If Becca needed to find a Coven here she’d have to go 3 counties over.  Luckily she has one in our old hometown. 

The county, however is huge.  It’s an Amish county as I’ve mentioned before a while back, and all of the town’s parking lots have rails set up for the horse and buggies to tie up…we are all familiar and comfortable with the peacable and lovely Amish community members who come among us daily, and I don’t believe I have ever witnessed a rude driver blowing their horn at a slow driving buggy clogging up the traffic on our busy roads.

This little town, this big county…Mayberry RFD on Valium as I like to call it, is a very religious community.

But it’s still America.  I was foolishly under the idea that meant something until this morning.

Libby wanted to know why I was upset that she and her classmates were handed out Bibles in school.  "I’m a Christian, Mommy.  I have a Bible already.  What’s wrong?"

"Do you remember when you thought you wanted to be Wiccan, Libby, because you liked the idea that Wiccans loved the environment and women and were loving?  Do you remember how mean everyone was to you because you said in school that you were Wiccan?  How they told you that you’d go to hell?  You came home crying and worried that being a Wiccan meant you couldn’t love God too…and you asked why I’d let you be a Wiccan if you were going to hell?"

"Uh huh.  That’s why I go to church now.  I want to be a Christian so I’ll go to heaven."

"Yes, I know.  I let you do that now because this is the time for you to explore religions, learn what you like and don’t like, what you believe and don’t believe, and for you to hear lots of different things so we can talk about them.  But mostly because people here are so pushy and mean if you don’t believe what they do.  But giving out Bibles in class is just making it worse, Libby.  It is showing all those kids that they are right to act that way.  It’s bad enough when the churches and their parents tell them they are right, but now the school is doing it too."


"What if you were still a Wiccan?  Really believed in Wicca?  Or Jewish?  Or a Buddhist, or an atheist?  Or what if other religions brought in *their* books and handed them out, would that be okay?"

"ohhhhhhhh, I see.  Can I go now, I’m gonna be late."

Why do I feel like that went zooooooming right over her head?

I called the principal as soon as Libby left, and of course she’s going to be in meetings all day, but even worse, I have this gut feeling that as soon as I protest this things are going to suck for Libby at this school.  Yeah, that’s the kind of school it is, the kind of county it is.  No more chances for Beta or Academic team for Libster, no more Best Citizen of the Month, no more anything that would require a nod from the faculty. 

The worst part is that we can’t really move as long as I am ill, and that’s not going to change.  Maybe Mike will get another job and we could move then, but the whole point of living here is that it is close to Mike’s work and he can run back and forth for lunch and check on me, he can be here in 7 minutes if something’s wrong with me, and that’s a safeguard we need in my condition.

I was looking up Kentucky Law Court Rulings on Religion in Schools, hoping to find something on Bibles and the handing out thereof, some precedent, I don’t know…I found out that no other state is as eager to fight the Ten Commandment Supreme Court Ruling as KY and even now we have a Bill in the KY house on it.  I did find this in the Kentucky Post, however and found it interesting…

Schools are required to adhere to court rulings and to maintain an air of neutrality on religious issues — not promoting religion or religious practices, but not preventing them, either, Blavatt said.

"In this case, what they’re asking is for school districts to certify that they will not support any religion and will not take proactive action to prevent or exclude anything religiously," he said.

Except of course, in the case of sticking Bibles in the hands of eleven year old little girls and boys during Language arts class.


Clear-ifying Saturday September 9, 2006

Posted by gingerbreadman in Rants.

This has been a week of "Let’s send Lynn stuff through email to drive her nuts", apparently.  I’ve gotten 3, Count ‘Em, Now…Three of the ACLU Holiday Tree "Let’s Send the ACLU Christmas Cards and Screw Up their Operations!" emails.

Errr, I’m a card-carrying member of the ACLU.  Thanks, but no.

I’ve gotten lots of "Hello, Fellow Christian!  Ban with us during this up-coming television viewing season and boycott ________ because of the salacious material, gay characters, insidious sexual inneundo, blatant drug use, etc.

Umm, I like gay characters, am a fervent supporter of gay rights, and my idea of boycotting TV programs is turning off the television.  And I’m no one’s Fellow Christian.

Today I get a "Funny Mexican Joke".  I have a Funny Mexican Husband and a really, really funny one-quarter Mexican daughter.  It was insinuated that since I didn’t find the joke funny, that I didn’t have much of a sense of humor.  Over-sensitive me, finding racist jokes un-funny.  I’ve never found any racist or bigoted jokes funny, I’ve always bristled at them and reprimanded anyone who told them in my presence, from the time I was old enough to fuss people out as a child.  My kids Jess and Becca were told to explain to any of the redneck friends they brought home they’d never be invited back if there were any negative talk of any kind from anyone in my home that I overheard.  There was never a problem–the girls didn’t like people like that any more than I do.  I don’t like ignorance or willful stupidity.  I just don’t tolerate it well…that’s my problem.  It’s my glitch in the human psyche, my prejudice.  I don’t like bigots, or people who push their hatreds and beliefs off on me.

So please…email me all you like, I like getting mail, I do!  But I’m a supporter of the ACLU…I won’t be annoying them at Christmas time…just be grateful I don’t bug you about a holiday tree, huh? 

I’m not your Fellow anything, except Human Being.  I don’t email you about my religious beliefs and try to convince you to act on them with me, so please don’t do that to me.  

Gays–Yay!!  Clear on my beliefs yet?  =)

I’m a rainbow flag waver.  I like all the crayons in the box.  I’ve dated people from many different countries and origins before settling for my Chicano.  That’s a Mexican/American…someone who has Mexican and caucasian heritage.  So Lala is a Chicana.  I don’t like Mexican jokes.  Or African american jokes, or arab jokes, or muslim jokes, any ethnic jokes.  I like chicken cross the road jokes.  Got any of those?

Yeah, I’m uptight.  Outta muscle relaxers.  Love me like I am, or just don’t email me.  =)


Evil Dwells There Monday September 4, 2006

Posted by gingerbreadman in Rants.
I haven’t really wanted to write here for almost a month now.  I’ve had a stalker I’ve been battling in email, monitoring with Statcounter (a very nifty free invisible isp tracker you can put on your spacespage) who turned mean after I told him to get lost.  But the ugly little things he said to me were nothing compared to the harassment he put Marc through the weeks before he went into the hospital and has put Marc’s brother Joshua, his love Bailey and closest friends through since Marc’s death last month.  Hideous comments on all their blogs, "Maggots are crawling through his brains now"…."You couldn’t have done better than him anyway"…"I’m laughing that he’s dead".
You can’t go private on blogspot, where most of these blogs are located.  Haloscan, used to moderate and ban comments keeps sickos from leaving things like that, but can’t/doesn’t keep anyone from reading blogs.  There doesn’t seem to be much that can be done to protect someone who wants to communicate openly with friends and family unless you leave yourself wide open to the evil out there in the world too.  The options are to take the abuse and erase it or shut down. 
What infuriates me….saddens me…just breaks my heart….Joshua shared with us….something he is not really comfortable doing…he started blogging because Marc prodded him into it.  When Marc died, instead of keeping it to himself and just turning to his friends at home, he opened up and let those of us in the blogging community he *knew* loved Marc so much know about Marc’s actions too.  The loving things he’d done to help Joshua after he was gone…the notes he left for Joshua to find, his wishes.  Joshua didn’t have to do any of that.  It was a generous act…a loving thing to do for all the people mourning his brother.
And this parasitic stalking freak, who had been rejected and turned away by Marc, by others, by me, by at least seven I counted on his webpage….people who had shut down blogs *JUST TO GET AWAY FROM HIM*….this thing spewed his rancid venom all over that love and kindness.
What Charlie….the stalker…the former commenter here wants….is attention….good or bad.  When he doesn’t get it, he goes nuts.   He wrote me often telling me how much he loved reading about my family.  I don’t even want to write about the kids anymore.  And lots of funny things have happened lately.  He feeds off other people’s blog lists.  So I hope he’s never been on any of your spaces.  He found me through Marc, and I befriended him at first because he was on Marc’s list all the time.  Marc and I didn’t realize just HOW obsessive he was until…welll….he showed everyone.  He visits here upwards of 105 times a day, according to Statcounter.  I went private again for a while to lock him out, telling him I’d deleted the space altogether….and then realized I was letting him direct my behavior.  Decide who did and didn’t get into my space…so I opened it back up hoping he wouldn’t check.  Guess who was back on two days later?!
So I’ve been paralyzed…with fury, sorrow, investigating how to get this blight off my blog, offline, out of my life, off my friend’s blogs…too damn mad to blog about it, not wanting to write about things he wants to read about and feed his interests yet annoyed with the fact that in not writing, I am holding back.
Joshua, Bailey…they’ve finally gotten their fill of it all and bless them…I can’t imagine how they’ve done it this long.  The generosity they have shown this long has touched me deeply.  I am so sorry this blight some might call a human named Charlie has done them enough damage. 
Me?  I’ve finally had enough too.  The Warrior Witch in me has kicked into gear.  The woman who shouts "Sex, sex, sex!" out the window at the top of her lungs just to see the look on hubby’s face…the lady who will answer the door in the red bra and jogging shorts if you insist on knocking incessantly, dangit!…the bane of the hometown PTO now is Out To Play.
I’m done letting the idea of some idjit vulture sitting on the computer hamper me from writing what I want, when I want.  Done considering going private to keep one out and missing out on others I might meet.  Mostly what I am is livid and happy to be so.  I don’t take being threatened well, even if they are simply passive threats. 
So lookout y’all.  The Gingerbread Man is on the loose again.
*Blessings on all but one of my visitors*

Good Mommas Tuesday August 1, 2006

Posted by gingerbreadman in Rants.
There are probably many people who will be surprised to find how happy I am that Andrea Yates, the woman who drowned her five young children in 2001, was finally found Not Guilty of Murder by reason of insanity and won’t spend her life in prison, instead, getting the help she needs.  Some day she will be allowed out into the sunshine again, enjoying the freedom her co-conspirators do-her husband who consistently and incessantly pushed pregnancy on a mentally ill woman after they were both told that more children would only further "guarantee psychotic behavior in Andrea".
Years and years of mental illness.  Years of medical treatments, suicide attempts.  five children born in six years…the last child, Mary, born after Andrea’s pyschiatrist had told the couple having another would cause more mental illness.  But Rusty insisted.  Taking Andrea off the one medication that actually brought her back to mental health, Haldol, Andrea’s husband pushed and pushed his unstable wife. His subservient, hyper-religious, mentally ill, stressed beyond belief, mentally and emotionally dependent upon him and completely under the influence of the ‘minister’ Michael Woroniecki who also preached to have as many children as nature allowed…and baby number five, Mary was born.  Barely 6 months later, all five children were dead by Andrea’s hands.  But not hers alone.
As the mother of six children, as a mentally ill person, as a stay at home mother, as a woman who once raised three toddlers/infant children who were only two years apart in age, I know a small…tiny, weensy bit of what Andrea Yates was going through.  Not much, but a tiny bit.  I didn’t have to live for years with four small boys in a cramped BUS, being inundated with religious concepts telling me I was the sole reason my children would make it to heaven or hell….that only my performance as a mother would influence their position in God’s judgement. 
I haven’t had voices inside my head whispering to me what a terrible mother I am, that people were watching me, that my children were going to hell, that I was evil, at fault, I was failing…failing in my job to the point that my children were evil…anyway.
I have felt I was failing.  I have felt at fault.  I have felt hopeless.  I don’t know any mother who hasn’t.  Certainly any stay at home mom who doesn’t go through it.  I remember the hopelessness, the hideous exhaustion of working outside the home mom’s too.  I can’t remember which is worse…but I think stay at home moms…because there is no escape…no paycheck…no pat on the back anywhere, no validation, no anything.  We are the Black Holes.
I have so many days when I consider walking out the door and just not turning back…just walking and walking until I fall down dead.  Or taking a bus to some unknown destination, changing my name, my identity, living the life of some new woman…someone else, anyone else but the woman with this drudge’s life…the life of a woman who scrapes other people’s crap off the toilet’s edge.  Washing dishes constantly.  Scrubbing floors and tubs and clothes and carpet stains.  Wiping noses and butts and walls and garbage can lids.  Teaching morals and ABC’s and manners and compromises and good behavior and responsibility when all I want to do is go back to bed or read a book or watch something I want to watch on TV or play on the computer instead of give of myself 24/7 to someone else.
But I do it anyway.  We all do, don’t we?  We get up in the morning, bone-weary from the night, exhausted still from the mind-numbing work of the day before and do the job again.  Because we love our children.  Because we love the job.  Because we are good people.  Because we’ve been taught to do so.  Because society says that if we don’t we are despicable people…not even people–women who walk out on their children are below human status, aren’t they?  Men who leave the home are bad parents, yes…but they are still redeemable, because after all, they’ve left them with the mother.   So the children are okay, aren’t they?  But let a mother leave her children…and that poor, poor father and those poor, poor children.  That despicable, heartless woman.
I have talked to momma’s under stress who didn’t know they were the only one who felt helpless under the strain of all they have to do every day.  Momma’s in tears because they were exhausted and weary and thought they were the only ones who wanted to walk out some days, even just in their daydreams.  Momma’s who thought if their children came down the stairs screeching "Momma!" one more time they would climb the walls….mothers who had flashes of pulling their faces off in skin peeling swatches with their fingernails…
and I have said "Me too….no, you are not alone, hon."  every time.  Been amazed that they did not know we all felt the same way sometimes. 
Andrea Yates drowned her sweet babies.  It was a horrible tragedy.  Her husband helped her as surely as if he brought them into the room for her, as far as I’m concerned.  The last psychiatrist who treated her and didn’t check her previous records at her previous hospital…where was his brain?  Read the links I provided.  Andrea Yates was no Susan Smith, killing her children to get out of raising them because she was tired of taking care of them, because she wanted to be rid of them.  I don’t believe she will ever get out of the mental facility she is in now…as a legal correspondent said, "every time the medication starts to work, she realizes what she did to her children, and she descends back into madness again"….this time from remorse. 
You Moms out there…who love your kids…and do it every day…despite the weight of all the every day of it all when it gets to you–I feel ya.  I love you.  I know how you feel.  Most of the time, like you, I don’t mind it either.  I adore my kids and I am grateful I get to be here for them-get to teach them what they need to know.  I am grateful I am the one who greets them every day after school and in the morning, who tells Lala about the world and what to do about it.  I even like the housework…really.  Most of the time.
But when I don’t….I really, really don’t.  And only the love of my family, my love for them, *lots of support from lots of places*, medication, and the weird combination of my personality traits  keeps me from snapping and walking out the door.  Keeps me from hurting anyone.  I am blessed.  What’s that saying?
There but for the Grace of God goes I?